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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/30073140">Your touch is my Home</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/ImportedfromMunich2/pseuds/ImportedfromMunich2'>ImportedfromMunich2</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Marvel Cinematic Universe</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Banter, Bucky doesn't mind though, But just fyi, Driving, First Kiss, Guns, M/M, Mild Language, Misunderstandings, Non-Consensual Touching, Pining, Touching</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 19:06:53</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>6,412</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/30073140</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/ImportedfromMunich2/pseuds/ImportedfromMunich2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Due to a misunderstanding, Sam thinks Bucky can't feel anything on his metal arm.<br/>Little does he know - Bucky can feel just fine; and doesn't understand why Sam is so touchy all of a sudden. </p><p>*Rating is for mild language</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>James "Bucky" Barnes/Sam Wilson, Minor or Background Relationship(s), Steve Rogers/Tony Stark</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>33</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>507</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“Just a few more minutes.” Stark mumbled from behind his computer screen. He must’ve sensed how antsy Bucky was getting. He’d been trying his best to sit still for almost an hour now, with wires coming out of his metallic arm, all hooked up and leading to Tony’s computer. Bucky watched the other man typing away, completely focused on the job at hand, occasionally looking over to poke or prod the arm still attached to him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Bucky let out a small sigh. A few more minutes could mean forever when it came to this guy, so he pulled out his phone and texted Sam to see what he was up to. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>B: Where you at? </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He stared at his screen and almost immediately got a response. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>S: Downstairs gym. Need backup? </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Bucky pursed his lips, hiding a small smile at Sam’s offer. He knew that Bucky never came to Stark’s lab alone - usually he had Steve or Sam as a buffer. But Bucky figured that if he was coming down to get upgrades done to his arm, he could face any awkwardness that might arise. Thankfully, though, it seemed that Stark wasn’t holding any grudges, if anything he was indifferent, more interested in the arm than anything he might have to say, and Bucky was happy to sit in companionable silence and let him work. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>B: Nah. Almost done here I think.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Stark did finally seem to be finishing up. He unplugged the wires from his arm, and closed him back up, giving him a pat on the shoulder. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Alright. I think we’re set. Wanna give it a test run?” Tony held up a screwdriver. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What, you gonna stab me with that?” Bucky joked, hoping to ease some of the tension. Stark just chuckled under his breath and tapped him lightly on the forearm, the clang of metal against metal echoing in the wide space of the lab. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Feel that?” Stark asked. Bucky nodded. “Okay. I’m going to try with something soft now. Close your eyes.” Bucky furrowed his eyebrows and frowned, and Stark laughed at that. “Just need to make sure you’re not picking up extra stimulus from sounds or vision. I won’t feel you up, promise.” Bucky hadn’t noticed that he was tense, but he forced himself to relax, and closed his eyes. He felt a finger softly run up his inner elbow, it was almost ticklish. He jerked away on reflex, eyes shooting open. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sorry.” He said. Tony just waved it off.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, no that’s good. You can feel small touches like that, means I haven’t broken anything. I think it should be working then, but let’s try with something bigger.” Tony turned around, looking for something else on his workbench. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>So it was working. That was a huge relief. Bucky had come to Tony in desperation a few weeks ago, after a big battle left his arm in a state of constant pain. Tony fixed it right away then, it seemed a pain receptor had just gotten crushed when a tractor - yes, a fucking </span>
  <em>
    <span>tractor - </span>
  </em>
  <span>landed on him. After Tony fixed it, he kept digging around inside the arm, and had told Bucky that he could probably make it so that he wouldn’t feel pain like that next time he was in battle. Bucky had quickly agreed to let Stark give it a try. Now here they were, and it seemed Stark held true to his word. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“See - the original Hydra design amplified pain so you know when someone is attacking you on your left. Pain is a great defense mechanism, it lets you know if something is hurting you, and tells your brain to move away. But the pain </span>
  <em>
    <span>itself </span>
  </em>
  <span>isn’t necessary as an alarm, so I’ve circumvented that altogether.” Tony casually chatted as he held up a blowtorch. Bucky held his breath. What the hell was Stark going to do with that? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Relax. Just want to make sure you feel heat. Stopped smoking back in 95’, and I couldn’t find a match - this is all I have down here.” He turned the torch on, and held it up to Bucky at a safe distance. Bucky reached over and felt the warm air surrounding the blue flame. He nodded again. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Good.” Tony confirmed. “Now...could you get a little closer? Just enough to see if you feel any pain?” Bucky steeled himself. Of course, he would need to test it to make sure it could </span>
  <em>
    <span>actually </span>
  </em>
  <span>prevent pain. He inched closer to the flame, probably closer than would be safe with his human hand, but was surprised when, instead of a scalding burn, he just felt a slightly hot buzzing sensation running up his arm. It felt strange, but not necessarily painful. He pulled back, not exactly liking the feeling. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That was...weird.” He examined his hand. It wasn’t scorched, but he could tell from the color of the metal that it was burning hot, even if he couldn’t exactly feel it. “It feels like bees walking around on my hand.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yep, that’s the workaround.” Stark explained. “After a certain threshold - instead of feeling pain, you’ll feel that tingling, to let you know something’s happening.” He picked the screwdriver back up, and started hammering on his bicep with the blunt end, presumably to show how it worked. Bucky didn’t feel anything more than the slight buzzing, he was actually getting used to it now. “See? It’ll even work so you don’t feel pain when you’re removing and re-attaching it. Even if some baddie decides to rip it off, you won’t feel much.” He proudly yelled through the loud clanging. Bucky put his other hand out, plucking the screwdriver from the energetic engineer. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Thanks. It’s not a punching bag, you know.” He reminded him. “You’re lucky you didn’t leave a mark.” He threatened him dryly, without bite. Stark just grinned, and waved him off. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, go on, take it for a drive. Let me know if anything bugs you.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He headed straight for the gym. </span>
</p>
<hr/><p>
  <span>“Think fast.” He called out as he chucked a bottle of water to Sam. Sam turned and caught it, gratefully taking a swig before addressing him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You got your upgrades?” He asked. Bucky liked that Sam kept up with his day-to-day events, even if they were more hum-drum than usual. It gave him someone to talk to, when he had no one for so long. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yep.” Bucky shifted his metal arm towards him, extending it out for Sam to see. “Hit me.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?” Sam eyed him cautiously. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hit me. As hard as you can.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You want me to hit your metal arm with my regular-ass hand? No thanks.” Sam ignored him, opting to take another sip of water instead. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Come on. Just wanna show you it works.” Bucky looked around, and saw the sports equipment tucked into a corner. He jogged over and pulled out a baseball bat, enthusiastically handing it to Sam. “Hit me.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Man, no way.” Sam refused to take it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“If you don’t, I’ll call Steve down to do it.” Bucky warned. He knew Sam would have no choice but to agree - Steve never held back when it came to testing the limits of his boyfriend’s technology. Sam frowned, but ultimately grabbed the bat in frustration. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fine. Only cuz’ I know Steve’ll make us do a whole sparring session if you call him down, and I’m trying to get to lunch on time today. I’m starving.” Sam reluctantly swung the bat with one back-handed arm, keeping his grip loose, the bat clattered lamely against his bicep. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, give me a break. That wouldn’t even hurt a </span>
  <em>
    <span>kid</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Swing like you mean it.” Bucky egged him on.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You asked for it.” Sam finally put down his water bottle and got into batting position. Bucky held out his arm gleefully, and barely felt anything when the bat cracked against his forearm, splitting in two. Sam’s eyes widened in fear, and he reached out to help - but Bucky, thrilled with the outcome like he’d found a new toy, just laughed in delight. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“See?? I didn’t feel a thing!” Bucky excitedly announced. “Hit me again!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I think I get it.” Sam nervously chuckled. “I’d rather Steve didn’t walk in here to catch me wailing on his best friend’s arm. Let’s go grab lunch, huh?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Bucky huffed, annoyed that he couldn’t keep playing with his newfound ability, but ultimately, his stomach growled louder than he could hide, and he agreed, turning back around toward the door. “You’re buying.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Of course.” Sam rolled his eyes and jogged to catch up to him. “But let me go shower first. Meet you in a minute.” Before Sam broke away towards the showers, he felt a few fingers quickly brush against his forearm - just once. He didn’t look back, just chuckled under his breath. Sam - such a worrywart. Probably still felt bad for hitting him. Bucky walked out to the front of the tower where he knew Sam would come find him after getting cleaned up - it was a nice day to sit in the sun. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>It was the very next day that the Avengers found themselves finishing off a pack of robots. Some sort of wolf-robot things. Bucky didn’t really understand a lot of things in the future, but it was easy enough to carry out the mission to keep all civilians in the downtown area out of harm’s way. </span>
  <em>
    <span>That </span>
  </em>
  <span>he could do. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>There were a few robots left that had been separated from the main pack, and he answered Hawkeye’s call that there was one lone wolf-bot trying to break through a wall into a closed off building on South Main Street. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“On it.” Bucky was just a block from there, so he ran over. He could see the robot from several yards away, trying to paw its way through exposed brick. Bucky slowly took aim - making sure he’d hit the head - and shot at it; once - twice - then his world was flying left as he was knocked down by another one of the robots. He used his metal arm to stop the wolf from going for his neck - letting it gnaw at his hand while he grabbed his fallen gun with the other, and tried to reposition himself to shoot. In the next moment, though, the wolf was being kicked out from above him by a familiar set of wings. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fancy meeting you here.” Sam called out as he stomped out the wolf’s CPU in its head. Bucky stood quickly, and looked over to make sure his original target was down. It was. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Thought you were patrolling the streets with Hawk.” Bucky questioned. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Think that was the last of em’.” Sam answered. “Stark’s scanning for any stragglers.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Bucky hummed in acknowledgement. He closed his eyes, gun at the ready, silently listening. It wasn’t always clear when the battle was over - contrary to how the movies made it out to be. It was normal that they might be on edge for hours until they were sure the threat was gone, until they got the go-ahead to move into recovery mode. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>So he listened. For any screams. For the distinctive hiss and hum of rudimentary electronics. For metal paws scraping against concrete. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>After what must have been several minutes, Stark’s voice on the comms broke through his concentration. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“All-clear. Report any injuries, and Cap will follow up with cleanup instructions.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He let his guard down, adrenaline draining from his body like a gush of water breaking through a dam. It was now that he finally felt a hand on his shoulder. How long had that been there? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He turned slowly to his left, and barely caught a glance at Sam quickly pulling his hand back, looking away like nothing had happened. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Bucky blinked. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You...good?” Bucky carefully asked. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hm? Yeah.” Sam replied casually. “You?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Bucky was...confused. But he wasn’t sure why. He went through a mental checklist of everything that just occured before the all-clear. Maybe Sam was worried that the wolf had hurt him? It was normal - before Stark’s upgrade - that anyone yanking on his arm like that would cause agony on his shoulder. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Worked like a charm.” He tapped his arm with the barrel of his weapon, giving Sam a soft look. </span>
  <em>
    <span>I’m okay, mother hen</span>
  </em>
  <span>; He tried to convey with his eyes. It must’ve been what Sam was looking for, because he looked relieved. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Good.” They stood in silence for a minute before Steve came back on the comms. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Everyone check in at City Hall, I’ll see you all there for cleanup instructions.” Thank God, Bucky thought, that was only a couple blocks away. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They decided to walk.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>He knew all about CGI and special effects nowadays. </p><p>It’s not that Bucky didn’t appreciate how far the entertainment industry had come - he loved having thousands of films to catch up on. It’s just that he’d seen so much in the last few decades that the CGI sometimes looked overdone, fake even. </p><p>Still, he was always up for a good flick, and he’d been dying to watch the new horror film that just came out. It was nice to just enjoy a scary movie for the suspense once in a while. Steve refused to go with him, saying he’d had enough horror for two lifetimes, thank you. But he was sure he could convince Sam to come. </p><p>“Why do you even want to see <em> that </em>one?” Sam asked as he reluctantly let himself be dragged to the theater. “The trailer looks so corny, it doesn’t even have good special effects.” </p><p>“Yeah, but it’s <em> original </em>.” Bucky countered as he bought their tickets. “Do you know how hard it is to find something that’s not just a remake of something else nowadays?” </p><p>“Ugh, grandpa.” Sam complained, but followed anyways, never one to turn down a bad movie. They got to their seats, right smack in the middle of the theater. They were the only ones in the entire room. </p><p>“Empty.” Sam turned to Bucky as the trailers came to an end. “On opening weekend.” </p><p>“Good. More popcorn for <em> me </em>.” Bucky brushed him off and took the giant tub of popcorn to hog on his lap. Sam chuckled and they settled in as the lights dimmed. </p><p>The room was completely dark and silent for several seconds. Bucky could feel his heartbeat in anticipation, knowing something was coming. Beat. Beat. Just when one of them was about to breathe out, a woman screamed, and a lifeless, bloody body appeared on the screen. </p><p>“What the<b> fuck</b>!” Sam gasped out as he jumped in his seat. </p><p>“Shhhhhhhhh!!” Bucky hushed him dramatically. Sam shoved him in response. </p><p>“Dick.” Sam hissed back, trying to adjust himself in his seat again. Bucky chuckled to himself. He’d never seen Sam get scared like that before - it would be entertaining to say the least. </p><p>The plot moved along slowly, and wasn’t all that interesting, but halfway through the movie, Bucky could sense that the jump-scares would start again soon. The music was building up tension, a little girl on the screen foolishly skipping into an abandoned warehouse in the middle of the night. The outcome was so predictable, but out of the corner of his eye, he could see Sam nervously biting his lip all the same. </p><p>Suddenly, the monster pounced on the screen, and Sam yelped, grabbing Bucky’s arm tight. </p><p>“It’s just a movie.” Bucky snickered. Sam shot him an angry glare. </p><p>“I <em> know </em> that.” He retorted, turning his attention back to the screen. “Asshole.” He muttered under his breath. </p><p>“We can go if you want.” Bucky suggested. </p><p>“No. I need to know what happens to the brother.” Sam angrily whispered back. Bucky smiled, and was about to reach for some more popcorn, when he realized - Sam was still holding on to him. The other man must not have noticed. </p><p>Bucky <em> definitely </em>noticed though. </p><p>Sam, still completely mesmerized by the events unfolding in front of him, didn’t realize that Bucky was outright staring at him now. Big hands were wrapped around Bucky’s bicep. He’d flinch whenever a monster appeared, fingers tightening their grip. </p><p>Normally, Bucky might’ve teased him for it, but...well. He didn’t exactly <em> want </em> Sam to...stop. He wasn’t sure why. It felt...nice to be the one to bring comfort to his friend. Sam looked so cute trying to keep a cool face, but ultimately failing every time someone screamed in the film. </p><p><em> Cute </em>? What the hell? </p><p>Bucky felt his ears go hot. What was he thinking? He finally peeled his gaze off his friend, looking down at his popcorn. He’d lost his appetite, instead focusing entirely on the warmth of Sam’s hands on him. All too soon, the lights came up around them, and at that same moment, Sam roughly pulled himself away. </p><p>Bucky missed the contact. Hazarding a glance over, he saw Sam looking away, apparently very interested in the empty wall to their left. Maybe he was embarrassed at having been so nervous through the whole movie. He didn’t want to make him feel worse, so he said something - anything - to break the ice. </p><p>“Good thing I had the popcorn.” He said in an even tone. Sam finally turned back, giving him a questioning look. “It would be all over the floor if <em>you</em> were in charge of it.” </p><p>“Shut up.” Sam said, but he smiled and stood, stretching his arms up and popping his back. It was hard not to be fully aware of how Sam’s shirt rode up when he did that. “You owe me dinner for making me sit through that.” </p><p>“Mhm.” Bucky stood too, following Sam out the theater. </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>The rest will be up in the next 24 hours!! ♥️♥️♥️</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“Who’s on watch tonight?” Sam asked as they rolled out their sleeping bags. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Steve. You've got morning shift." Bucky replied, rolling his travel bag into a makeshift pillow. "Can't you fly into the next city over and grab us some mattresses? Or at least some real pillows?" </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Right. The giant bird carrying a mattress in won't alert them at </span>
  <em>
    <span>all.</span>
  </em>
  <span>" Sam deadpanned. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They were on a stealth mission and hadn't had much time to pack, but at least they had a couple light blankets. Steve was in the next room over, watching for movement from the building below their window overnight - Nat was sleeping in the same room so she wouldn't bother them when she got up for her midnight shift. They were waiting for the target to arrive sometime in the next 48 hours, and hadn't gotten much rest between flying out on short notice, sneaking into town undetected, and trying their best to make this small, cramped apartment their home base until it was time to move in. Bucky was dead tired, and couldn't wait to hit the sack, even if it was on the dusty floor in the only corner of the room not visible from the window. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even the prospect of </span>
  <em>
    <span>Sam </span>
  </em>
  <span>only inches away from him probably wouldn't keep him up. Probably. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was odd. He found himself thinking of the other man more often lately. Sam would cross his mind late at night, when he felt lonely in his big bedroom at the tower. He’d instinctively look over whenever someone made a joke - liked to see Sam’s eyes crinkle in laughter. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He knew it was just a small crush. Nothing more than that. Bucky was known to be a smooth talker. It was rare that he couldn't talk his way into a first date, at least. But with Sam...well it was different. Sure, they liked to banter. And Sam was definitely attractive, no denying that. But they were friends. And they </span>
  <em>
    <span>worked</span>
  </em>
  <span> together for crying out loud. If he made a move and Sam wasn't interested…</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Night." Sam's soft murmur pulled him out of his thoughts. He watched in the darkness as the other man curled up on his side, facing him, and pulled the covers up to his chin. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Night." Bucky grunted. A soft sigh beside him made his heart flutter. He knew he needed his rest though - Steve could call out for them at any moment to take on the sleeper cell and their leader, and he needed to be alert and ready. He laid back, letting his arms fall to his sides - couldn’t find a very comfortable position to sleep in like this - but at least this way his back wouldn’t be killing him in the morning. He closed his eyes and tried to empty his mind. The stillness of the small rural town was a stark contrast to Manhattan, and he almost drifted into slumber, when he felt something brush his left pinky finger. His eyes shot open, and he turned quietly to see what was touching him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sam’s arm was stretched out in front of him, two fingers lightly resting on the edge of Bucky’s palm. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Was...was he still awake? Did he realize he was touching him? Bucky held his breath. Tried to listen to Sam’s breathing - but the rush in his ears was too loud to make anything out. How long had it been since they laid down? Could anyone even fall asleep that fast? Maybe Sam expected Bucky to do something, to touch him back. Would it be too much to pull him closer? God, of course he couldn’t do that right now. Steve and Nat were right in the other room - the door was wide open for fuck’s sake. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>After what felt like an eternity of panic, but was really only a few minutes, the deafening pounding of his heart was drowned out by a light snore coming from Sam. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Oh. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He </span>
  <em>
    <span>was </span>
  </em>
  <span>asleep. Bucky was relieved, but...maybe a little disappointed at the same time. Of </span>
  <em>
    <span>course </span>
  </em>
  <span>it was just an accident. Sam probably moved around a lot when he slept. He just reached out and touched Bucky by mistake. Hell, he would likely shift again in a minute and move away. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Bucky waited. And waited. His eyes started to droop, fatigue catching back up with him. He felt himself being pulled into sweet unconsciousness. And in all that time, Sam hadn’t moved. He was too tired to fight it, and let his hand curl in, weakly holding on to Sam’s fingers. Sam’s soft, consistent breathing was the lullaby that finally put him to sleep. </span>
</p>
<hr/><p>
  <span>He heard some rustling next to him, whispers being exchanged, then his hand felt cold. He struggled to pry his eyes open. It was still relatively dark in the room, it was probably early in the morning, but the first thought running through his head was: why was his hand empty now? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He turned on his side towards the warm sleeping body next to him. He almost reached back out to take the hand in his again, when shaggy blonde hair shuffled into his line of sight. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ugh!” He pulled away, realizing it was Steve next to him now. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mmm?” Steve’s half-asleep face popped up from under the blanket. “What?” Bucky gave him a look and sat upright to compose himself. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“N-nothing.” He grumbled out. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mm..” He heard a plop against the sheets as Steve let his head fall back down. “Jus’ tell’hm how you feel…” Steve mumbled groggily. Bucky sometimes hated how easily Steve could read him. He unrolled the bag he’d been using as a pillow, taking out his toothbrush and hoping the apartment had running water this morning. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s not that eas-” He didn’t even finish his sentence before a loud, crackling snore interrupted him. He looked over again and Steve was fast asleep. How the hell could these people fall asleep so damn fast? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>As he changed, he wondered if they’d held hands all night. If Sam saw them holding hands this morning. If he even realized he’d reached out in his sleep, or if this would be just a small, imposing memory that Bucky would have to keep to himself? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He walked in to the room next door once he was cleaned up, and found Sam on post at the sniper scope aimed at the small building neighboring them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Morning.” Sam called out, not looking away from the scope. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey.” Bucky replied. “Where’s Nat?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Steve took both night shifts.” Sam pointed with a free hand at the tall abandoned high-rise on the other side of their target building. Bucky noticed a broken window. Of course, the brilliant Natasha would want both sides covered. “Hope he gets some rest before they show.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah.” Bucky tried to think of a way to bring their sleeping situation up, when he heard Sam shuffle, and caught a protein bar thrown at him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Intel says they just crossed the border, so they’ll be here before end of day. Better get something in ya’ in case they decide to ride straight to headquarters.” Sam explained. Bucky sighed. Now wasn’t the time to bring this up - they already had enough to worry about, and it was all probably just nothing anyways. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Let me know when you want me to take over.” Bucky answered, taking a bite out of the bar. Sam hummed in agreement. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>He never touched his other arm. </p><p>It had been months now since Bucky couldn't stop thinking about Sam. He wasn't able to quite place when or where it began - but it seemed like something had been building, on his end at least. He <em> knew </em> that Sam hadn’t started off so chummy-chummy, and even now, after all this time, it seemed like they were all a bunch of coincidences. Small accidents. But all together, they mounted up into something that Bucky just couldn’t ignore. </p><p>It kept happening, over and over. Sam would always find a way to sit on Bucky’s left. He’d lean into him sometimes - not in an obvious way - just enough so their shirt sleeves might brush against each other when one of them shifted, or the other laughed. When they would go out for a drink, Sam would stand close enough that their elbows might knock together, even if they were the only ones at the bar. At dinner, Sam might reach over for the potato salad, and sometimes let his torso brush Bucky’s shoulder. <em> Those </em>days made Bucky feel the most crazy. </p><p>But it was always on his <em> left </em> side. Bucky couldn’t figure out <em> why. </em>But it happened often enough that he subconsciously found himself gravitating to sitting on Sam’s right, just for the prospect of one more touch, one tiny brush of a finger, a caress of soft skin on his elbow, the imposing zipper on Sam's big leather jacket  digging into his arm. But whenever Bucky tried to turn to catch him doing it, Sam would pull away, act like nothing had happened. Sometimes it felt like he might be imagining it. </p><p>Hell - just earlier <em> today: </em> they were sitting in on a meeting with the rest of the Avengers, when Sam started to casually trace the patterns on his metal arm with the cap of his pen. It had given him goosebumps. He almost turned around to ask what the hell was going on - but he didn’t want to draw any unwanted attention to Sam, and he <em> certainly </em>didn’t want him to stop. </p><p>Sam slipped out of the meeting before Bucky could ask, but this kind of repeat offense was driving him insane. What did all these touches mean? He didn’t seem to be like this with any of the other Avengers. </p><p>Maybe Sam thought Bucky liked the contact? Which wasn’t entirely untrue...he <em> did </em> like it, when it was from <em> Sam </em>. But had he given Sam any indication of that at any time? Sam would have no way of knowing this, unless he asked Steve - but even then, he knew Steve wouldn’t say something that intimate about him without asking first, or without giving Bucky a heads up. He knew how he felt about Sam. </p><p>Whatever the case may be, Bucky had a plan to find out once and for all. </p>
<hr/><p>“Busy today?” He asked once he finally found Sam alone, walking back into the tower from a late lunch. </p><p>“No. What’s up?” Sam answered. Bucky already knew he wasn’t busy - he’d asked FRIDAY to discreetly clear Sam’s schedule for today. </p><p>“I need to go pick something up from Long Beach. Come with me.” Bucky said. </p><p>“Alright.” Sam continued, heading for the elevators. Bucky tapped him on the shoulder and Sam turned around. </p><p>“Nope. We’re driving.” Bucky nodded his chin back over to the front doors. </p><p>“Why?” Sam argued. “That’ll take forever. It’ll be rush hour by the time we hit the bridge. Let’s just take the quinjet.” </p><p>“We’ll take the scenic route.” Bucky flashed a set of keys from behind his back. “With Stark’s Lambo. I’ll even let <em> you </em>drive.” </p><p>“Whoa.” Sam held his hands up and took a step back - as if Bucky was holding a live bomb. “How’d you get those keys? You <em> trying </em>to get me on Stark’s shit list?” </p><p>“Come on.” Bucky dangled the keys closer - knowing Sam couldn’t resist a fun, fast car. “You really think FRIDAY would let us out of here with Stark’s toy if he didn’t give us permission? Plus, it’s an older model. He said to just keep it under a hundred, if we can.”</p><p>“Hm.” Sam frowned. Bucky could practically see him succumb to his barely-contained excitement. “Fine, but I better not have a pissed off Ironman chasing me down in an hour.” </p><p>“Promise.” Bucky grinned as Sam snatched the keys from his hand, like a fish taking his bait.</p>
<hr/><p>“A little small, don’t you think?” Sam ducked his head down to look inside the sleek, pristine car. </p><p>“I think it’s called a Roadster.” Bucky explained, conveniently omitting that the small size would work to his advantage. </p><p>“Nice.” Sam forgot all about the cramped space as he made himself comfortable in the driver’s seat. “You sure you need to go to Long Beach? Maybe we should just drive her out west on the open roads and see how fast she can go.” Sam’s eyes sparkled in delight at gripping the steering wheel.</p><p>“I’m pretty sure FRIDAY sees all.” Bucky tapped at the dashboard, clearly engraved with the Stark Industries logo. </p><p>“Ugh.” Sam pouted as he buckled in. “Speed limit it is.” </p><p>That didn’t deter him from having a good time, though. Bucky insisted that he wasn’t in a hurry, so Sam opted to take the back roads, circumventing all the traffic in favor of less crowded highways. He even put down the windows once they were off the highway, enjoying the clear sky and fresh air. </p><p>Bucky waited until the right moment - when Sam was unsuspecting and waiting for a red light to turn green in the middle of a winding road cutting through a park. He slyly put his arm on the handrest between them - it was a small space, and he knew it would take up the whole section, and Sam, consciously or unconsciously, wouldn’t be able to resist reaching out. </p><p>And he was right. Just as the light turned green again, Sam revved up and sped off, and, seemingly without thinking, rested his free hand right next to Bucky’s, the tips of his fingers barely curling into Bucky’s palm. Bucky acted quickly - he closed his hand, fully holding on to Sam’s now. </p><p>“What the-” Sam sputtered as he tried to pull his hand back, but Bucky wouldn’t let go. “What are you - I’m driving man.” </p><p>“Pull over then.” Bucky goaded, never letting his grip falter. Sam quickly veered off into the shoulder and put the car in park, turning fully to Bucky now and pulling his hand away. </p><p>“What?” He asked, clearly annoyed. </p><p>“Why do you keep doing that?” Bucky demanded. “You keep touching me.” </p><p>“No I don-”</p><p>“<em> YES. </em> You <em> do. </em>” Bucky wasn’t going to let him go without an explanation. “You touch my metal arm when you think I’m not paying attention.” He held up his arm as if it was an undisputable exhibit at a trial by jury. “Then when I try to catch you, you act like nothing happened. Why?” </p><p>“I don’t know what you’re talking abo-”</p><p>“Stop avoiding the question!” Bucky shouted. He groaned in frustration, burying his face in his hands. He took a deep breath, and rubbed his temples before just putting it all out there. He’d rather take the rejection - just let Sam take the car and find a way back by himself than take another day of <em> not knowing. </em> “I...I’m not saying I don’t <em> like </em>it. I just..want to know.” He looked over and saw Sam. He looked genuinely confused. Was this all really just in his head? “Or...fuck.” He felt the lump in his throat grow harder, his chest sink into his stomach. “I thought....sorry. Maybe I’m making a big deal out of nothing. I just...sometimes, you sit close to me and I can feel you next to me. And I could feel you touching me when we fell asleep on that mission a few weeks ago, and-”</p><p>“You <em> felt </em>that?” Sam breathed, seemingly shocked. </p><p>“Well...yeah.” Bucky’s heart was racing, but he needed to finish this conversation. “I was awake.” </p><p>“No I mean...I - you - you said you didn’t <em> feel </em>anything in that arm anymore.” Sam spilled out.</p><p>“What?” Well, now Bucky was confused. “I never said that.” </p><p>“<em> Yes, </em> you <em> did. </em> ” Sam insisted. “When Stark gave you that upgrade. You made me hit you with a baseball bat. You said you didn’t feel anything.” Bucky remembered that day. That was <em> months </em> ago, but come to think of it - it <em> was </em>around that time that he started to notice Sam touching him more. </p><p>“No. I said I didn’t feel any pain. I didn’t say that I can’t feel in this arm.” Bucky wavered a bit. <em> Had </em> he said that? Maybe he hadn’t explained himself at that time. “I...think. I mean...I can <em> feel </em>things. Just...pain doesn’t really register anymore like before. But...yes. I can feel when you touch me.” He watched as Sam’s face went from confused, to stunned, to outright humiliated. </p><p>“Shit.” He stared down at the steering wheel, forehead rigid with strain. “You never <em> said </em>anything.” He remarked, as if that would explain it. </p><p>“It wasn’t really a big deal at first.” Bucky clarified, happy to share his thoughts if it would help Sam talk. “Then, when I started to notice it more, I didn’t want you to stop.”</p><p>“Then why the interrogation?” Sam looked out the window, away from Bucky. </p><p>“Just wanna know why.” Bucky extended his hand to Sam’s, which was laying on his lap now. Sam didn’t budge, but he seemed to ponder the answer himself for a minute before finally responding.  </p><p>“I don’t know.” He started. “I think...at first it was just...curiosity. I'd always wondered...I wanted to know what it felt like. To touch you. It’s a weird thing to ask. <em> Can I feel your arm?... </em> That’s not something a friend usually asks.” He huffed out a stunted laugh. “And I thought you wouldn’t notice if you couldn’t feel anything. Then… then it was more like...a habit. I felt better when I was touching you in some way. It grounds me. Like...a safety net.” He furrowed his brow like he was trying to make sense of it, but Bucky smiled and nodded, stroking his wrist with his thumb gently to urge him to continue. “After a fight...you don't always tell me if you're okay. So...feeling you. If I can make sure you're breathing, moving...it helps calm me down I guess. And I figured it was easier to just touch you there, where I thought you wouldn’t know, than to ask you if I could touch you...um...anywhere else.” </p><p>“Hm.” Bucky felt hope rising in him again, but he tried to tamp it down. Sam <em> wanted </em> to touch him. It wasn’t all in his head after all. But there was still the possibility it didn’t <em> mean </em>anything. “So...it makes you feel better...safer...to touch me. And if I give you permission to touch me anywhere, anytime? Would that...change anything?”</p><p>Sam shrugged. </p><p>“Sam.” Bucky waited until the handsome man finally turned to look at him. God, he was gorgeous. Bucky threw all caution out the window. “Can I kiss you?” </p><p>Sam’s eyes widened. His mouth opened slightly in surprise, but he slowly nodded, shuffling forward to sit up straight. Bucky chuckled at that, and leaned in, brushing his lips against Sam’s, letting the pressure build until Sam couldn’t take it anymore, and pushed into him too. It made his head spin, the way Sam opened his mouth, his broad tongue pulling an involuntary moan from Bucky. His hands finally, <em> finally </em>touching him with purpose - one cupping his jaw sweetly, the other gripping his metal arm - sure to keep him close. </p><p>A blaring horn blasted as a huge semi truck whizzed by them at a dangerous distance. Their lips parted in shock, and in the next moment, they found themselves laughing it off. </p><p>“Thanks for asking.” Sam said, and Bucky smiled at him, squeezing his hand in response. “S-sorry. I should’ve just asked too, I should've-”</p><p>“We better get off the emergency lane, huh?” Bucky didn’t let him finish that apology, managing to change the subject through a grin - he couldn’t wipe it off his face now that he knew how Sam felt. </p><p>“Are we even going to Long Beach?” Sam put the car into gear and drove them back onto the road. “What are you <em> supposedly </em> picking up? Or was this all some ruse to get me to talk?” </p><p>“Oh, we’re picking something up alright.” Bucky rested his hand back on the armrest between them, and his heart did a backflip when Sam held it, intertwining their fingers, like it was nothing out of the ordinary. “There’s some keys I need to grab.”</p><p>“More keys?” Sam questioned. “What, you starting a collection?” </p><p>“I got us a beachfront rental house for the night. Nat packed you an overnight bag. It’s in the trunk.” </p><p>“Overnight, huh?” Sam’s eyebrow hiked up. “That’s mighty presumptive of you.” </p><p>“My backup plan was to walk home.” Bucky half-joked. </p><p>“Hm.” Sam pretended to ponder the idea for a bit. “As fun as that would be to watch, I think I’ll take the beach day, if you don’t mind.” He teased, finger softly caressing the inside of Bucky’s palm. </p><p>“I don’t mind at all.” Bucky smiled to himself. </p><p>They held hands the rest of the drive there. </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thank you for reading!!! Comments are much appreciated!! ❤️️❤️️❤️️❤️️</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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